Happy Birthday Titus!

On this day, September 19, in the year 2005, I walked into my doctor’s office DETERMINED to have a baby! I was up on the two weeks overdue mark, and no signs of anything happening yet…or so I thought.

I had been having contractions, but my pelvis was TOO SMALL for my baby to be born naturally. He had been trying to be born for almost 4 weeks, actually, but my body wasn’t agreeing with this activity at all. My doctor ended up doing a C-Section on his lunch break, to bring my son into this world!

Now, I used to hold my infant Titus, pinch his little nose, and joke saying nonsense like, “When you are older, I’m gonna let you know just how much trouble you gave me from the start!” And, you know… it’s like he knew what I was saying, and decided to just make it better from there! His first smile was in the back of a church sanctuary, in the pew on his Mawmaw’s lap. We were all excited! 

When I wanted him to smile for me…he farted. Yeah…that’s my child!

With each year that passes, Titus grows taller and taller…he started out BIG anyway! 10 pounds and 9 ounces and nearly 22 inches long, he was too big for newborn clothes, and never got to wear the newborn or size 1 shoes! Not my ideal first child’s size…but I wouldn’t have him ANY other way!

Titus has always been the type to do it RIGHT. When he cut teeth, he cut them 5 or 6 at a time. We didn’t have to worry about 5 or more teething sessions. He got it all done in 3! Oh the recollection of sleepless nights (thankfully very few), and a young mama hurting for her baby during this time. Until he bit me, of course. Haha.

At nine years of age Titus is 59.5 inches tall (that’s almost 5 ft *wink*); he wears a men’s size 5.5 shoe; his reddish hair, bright freckles, and sparkling eyes just enhance his already adorable personality! In his nine, short (yet seemingly long at times) years Titus has endured separation and divorce of his parents, moved 5 times, experienced changes in family, gained a stepfather and stepsister, went to 2 different schools and was told he’s “slow” and picked on in both schools, moved to homeschooling (this year), and has excelled greatly through it all! He has never said a bad word about anyone, even those who said bad things to him. Titus and his heart of gold.

Titus has endured several things most boys do, and then a little more… kissing pavement (multiple times), splinters, bruises, cuts, scrapes, blood, pain, but such are the prices of

being a super hero, power ranger, transformer, cop, soldier, scientist, doctor, zombie, monster, dinosaur, ninja, Ninja Turtle, lion, robot, and so many other things that I cannot even cover in the imagination of my child! Most of his markings were laughed off and forgotten in minutes. Some, not so much.

He had an incident last year that landed him in the ER for the first time with an injury. Titus was bitten by a large dog, and nearly lost his thumb and part of his hand. He only cried when the shock wore off at the triage nurse’s desk in the ER. His tears were short lived when his fascination of the repair process grew. Yep…my child. There are some points in time I’d prefer he remain emotional and weepy. LOL! But no. Not Titus. Titus had to watch them mess with his hand, asking questions the whole time! And here I thought I’d be comforting him! Nope! Mama had to walk away and go sit on

the other side of the room while Titus inquired about what they were doing to his hand, every step in the process, making me even queasier with their discussion. Yeah, even now my nerves get all super sensitive at the thought!

But that is just another thing about my child that completely fascinates me to no end!

(Along with his ability to fit in tight places...kinda like his Aunt Nikki)

Titus’ favorite color is green. Why? Because all his favorite things are green. Grass, trees, the mountains in the pictures and paintings, the walls in his bedroom. He loves hiking. He loves fishing. He wants to be a “Police Boss” when he grows up. He loves working with his hands. Science is his favorite subject. He says his favorite subject is Art, which I guess the two are kind of the same. He says they are. Titus loves people. Sometimes he cannot interact as he would like to, but he is very observant, and aware. He captures details at a glance that most people miss looking directly on, in any

given area.

Titus: My son. My heart. My joy. My comfort, even when I don’t realize I am in need of comfort. He picks up on things under the surface, and surprises me often with his depth of understanding. For one so young, he knows so much. His random hugs and smiles, and his unexpected “I Love You’s” warm my heart every time he gives them. There aren’t enough words I could say to describe the love I have for my redheaded freckled big boy! I could blog on, and on, and…on. I am SO BLESSED to have the privilege of being Titus’ mother. I am thankful for every single moment I have with him! And I look forward to every moment we will have hereafter!

Happy Happy Birthday Titus! I LOVE YOU SOOOOOOOOOOOO MUCH!

Love,

Your Lucky-to-have-you Mother! <3

PLEASE RECYCLE

I’m an avid fan of recycling. Taking cans, bottles, boxes, and bags to the recycling center and getting a small amount of cash for doing a great amount of good often feels great! I also know that I am doing my part to shrink the amount of waste that fills the landfills out there these days! In my city there are three types of bins we put out on the street. One is Green, and it is for the organic materials that can become compost of some sort. One is Blue, and everyone puts all their recyclable materials into it. The last one is Black, and is where people put the garbage that cannot be recycled or compost.

The other day, as I was cleaning out a glass jar to be placed in my recycle bin, a thought hit me…

So many times we toss garbage out of our mouths, things that cannot be taken back, recycled, or reused. People are treating each other like the trash they spew. Gossip, tale telling, back biting, and creating reputations for themselves, and others that make them appear very ugly and used outside. All of that mess generally comes from an inside source: something that has gone bad in there! Hurt feelings, broken heart, and damaged mind from too many verbal beatings they may have incurred themselves in the past. Either way, if you’ve ever read the book “Hurt People Hurt People” this concept would be more easily understood at a glance.

What do we do with those people? Do we open that black bin on the street and toss them in? Write them off as trash and worthless? This is where the process of recycling is so amazing! Are we any better than they? Of course we cannot change other people, and we may have to remove them from our lives if that is what it takes to maintain our own wellbeing, but we can look at ourselves, and that is what I intend to do right now…

What was I doing as this thought crossed my mind? I was rinsing out a used jar with hot water. Snap! Rinse that vessel out! Get it ready for a change! Toss out the yuck, and put yourself through a cleansing process. If we don’t work on ourselves, something is going to work on us. If there is one thing I have learned in this life it is that when we acknowledge that work needs to be done, and we do it, things are not quite as hard on us as it would be if we just let it go. (Let it go…let it goo) *chuckles*

After cleaning that vessel out, let the Master do the hard work. Melt, reshape, reform, recycle! Recycling may not be easy…in fact it takes work, and sometimes can be painful. But the end result can be such a thing of beauty! What may have started out as a regular milk jar may come back as a beautiful ornate glass piece that creates “ooh’s” and “Ahh’s” from people all around! Something that started out as a general space taker may come back as a functional piece of work that is useful in so many ways! The possibilities are ENDLESS! So when you feel ugly, nasty, used, hurt, abused, and just all around like trash DO NOT throw yourself out just yet!!

Go Green! Take that step to make it better! Rinse that mind! Pour the nasty out of that heart! Run outside into the woods and scream. Go to the riverside, or the Oceanside, lakeside, any shoreline, and just look at the vast amount of space out there…and remember you are bigger than your problems. You are greater than the pain that has driven the hole inside, making you feel like the garbage you are NOT.

There are SOOOOO many examples I could use, people who have lost loved ones, homes, and so on, who have taken all that pain, all the mess that has boiled inside, or that they kept inside for months and years, released it and let a change begin! Some have started movements for awareness of whatever stole their loved one. Some have started campaigns to help families who lost homes in disasters, and some just do what they can to help those in need…

What is your pain? What is your need? What have you buried inside, kept cooped up in the vessel you are? Empty it out, rinse, and place in the hands of the one who can make it new. And let yourself be made new!

I’m in the process of my own recycle. Man let me tell you, it has been an experience! And who knows when the product will be complete? But every moment has been well worth the sweat, tears, pain, joy, emotional moments (or weeks), growth, and maturity I am gleaning from the experience! If I had to do it over again (insert recycle pun here)…I would. And I’m sure I will.